The Witching Hour: The Scariest Time of Day for New Parents

Nearly every parent can recall a moment during those early weeks of their baby’s life, when their sweet, innocent little bundle of joy seemed more like a terrifying little monster. This scary time is often referred to as the “Witching Hour”, derived from folklore to mean the time of day when the ghosts, monsters, and demons were said to have appeared. 

Like the term ‘morning sickness’ (which frequently happens far more often than just the morning), the phrase ‘witching hour’ is also a misnomer. Your newborn may spend well more than 60 minutes in this seemingly inconsolable state. Particularly during this time of year, when the sun sets earlier, it is not uncommon for the witching hour to include the hours leading up to and immediately following sunset. 

So what then IS the witching hour?  

The witching hour is a period of excessive fussiness, crying, irritability, and/or sleeplessness, sometimes spanning several hours, often occurring during the late afternoon into evening. It is extremely common for newborns, particularly in weeks 2-4 of their lives, to exhibit this behavior but can (unfortunately) extend for weeks. 

What causes the witching hour in newborns?

Overstimulation

It’s the end of another long and grueling day; you’ve been bombarded by noises, lights, sounds, textures, smells, and other external stimuli for hours on end. It’s enough to make adults want to retreat to their happy place! Now, consider a newborn, only weeks into this journey that is life, experiencing all of these same stimuli. This is why the number one cause of the ‘witching hour’ can be attributed simply to overstimulation. As humans, when we are overwhelmed by external stimuli, it is difficult for our mind and body to rest – overstimulation leads to being overtired too.

Gastrointestinal Discomforts

Your baby’s GI system is also brand new, working hard to learn how to suck, swallow, and digest milk, absorb nutrients, and pass gas and stool. It can be expected that this immaturity can contribute to increased gas (and the ensuing fussiness and discomfort), particularly after a full day of feedings. It’s also not unusual for excess gas and discomfort to compound throughout the day. 

Hunger

A baby’s nutritional needs change throughout the course of the day. It is not uncommon for babies to appear more hungry during the late afternoon and evening hours. This is partially a biological response for breastfed babies in that breastmilk production and supply tends to be at the lowest during this time of day. Babies who are bottle fed may exhibit hunger cues even after finishing their usual portion of milk. 

Tricks & Treats: What can we do to help our baby through the witching hour?

Reduce stimulus 

If you have taken DOB’s Baby 101 workshop, you have likely learned about Dr. Harvey Karp and his 5 S’s; Swaddle, Sway, Side-lying, Suck, and Shhh (or Sound). Combining these five activities can help to reduce external stimuli and, hopefully, encourage baby to close their eyes. A favorite trick for our postpartum doulas is taking baby, swaddled and with a pacifier, into the bathroom, turning off the lights and turning on the exhaust fan! And baby-wearing can be a treat for the whole family. Putting baby in an inward-facing wrap or carrier is a great tool to get through this time, too.

Encourage burps and toots

Encouraging baby to burp and pass gas frequently throughout the day can help alleviate fussiness and bloating in the evenings. Whether breast or bottle feeding, burping baby mid-feeding is always a good idea. Giving baby time to lay and move their limbs can also aid in teaching them how to release gas as well. Ultimately, time and maturity are the only true ‘fix’. 

Feed frequently

While we can’t eliminate baby’s desire to feed frequently in the evenings, sometimes preemptively increasing afternoon feedings can help. This may mean waking more frequently for shorter durations between feedings (2-2.5 hours maximum would be our recommendation). Or increasing the amount or duration at the last feeding session prior to the anticipated witching hour time frame. Cluster feeding, especially in the evenings, is very normal for breastfed babies in anticipation of a growth spurt. Again, this is an instance where time may be the only solution.

Is there a way to eliminate the witching hour?

While it can be difficult to accommodate for every family, one of the benefits of this time of year is the earlier sunsets.  If their witching hour is around 5 pm, ensuring they have a quality late afternoon nap may help. Take advantage of the darkness to push baby’s bedtime back a bit. If baby seems cranky, irritable or inconsolable by 7:30 pm every night, aiming to have them settled and to sleep by 7 pm could help (and mean you might get a few minutes of peace!).

While we can not guarantee that these tips and tricks will work every time with every baby, we can assure you that you are not alone, and ultimately, this time will pass. 

Ways to Help Your Older Child Adjust to the New Baby

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Welcoming a baby into your family is a joy, but a joy that can come with worry. If you’re expecting baby number two, you might be worried about how your older child will adjust to a new sibling. Jealousy is a natural emotion for kids, especially during the ages when they are particularly attached to their parents. They’ll notice you are taking time to care for baby and that people are excited about baby. But, there are still ways that you can help your older child adjust. 

How can I help my older child adjust to a new baby? 

One of the ways that parents can help older children adjust to a new baby is by involving siblings in newborn care, to the extent that they want to be involved. If they are a little older, they might want to help with feeding or bathing. If they’re younger, you can have them get a pacifier and put it in baby’s mouth (gently) or get a diaper. 

Especially for toddlers, it can be helpful for parents to acknowledge the difference between them and the baby. You might find yourself telling the older child to wait while you feed baby or change a diaper. On occasion, you can tell baby that they have to wait while you do something with your older child. You can also remind your older child that they are a big kid and doing something or have something that baby can’t. Emphasizing that they are special can help with feelings of jealousy. 

How do I keep my older child from feeling overwhelmed when baby comes?

 Having a baby can throw everyone’s schedules off, from sleep to meals. One tip to help your older child adjust to a new baby is by keeping their schedule as consistent as possible. If they go to daycare three days a week, keep them at daycare even if you or your partner are home with baby. 

Babies do need a lot of attention, which can create feelings of jealousy in your older child or that there is a certain level of unpredictability. When you feed your baby and do need to devote attention solely to baby, it can help to find something calm and special that the older child can do. While you are trying to have a calm moment for feeding, you can let your older child watch a special show or read a book. 

How can friends and relatives help my older child adjust to a new baby? 

One of the easiest things friends and relatives can do to help your older child or children adjust to baby is acknowledge the sibling first. When they come over to meet baby, have visitors prioritize the sibling. It is so easy for everyone to get excited about the new baby, and your other child can notice this excitement. Have friends and family ask the older sibling if they want to introduce baby or share something special about their new sibling. 

If you have someone who can help you during the postpartum period–whether it is a doula, a family member or friend–you have a great opportunity to prioritize each child on their own. They can take care of baby so that you have quality time with the older sibling. Or, they can take care of the older sibling so you can either rest or take care of baby. 

5 Basic Questions to Think About Before Baby Comes Home

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Being pregnant and preparing for birth can feel overwhelming enough without considering what happens when you bring baby home. But postpartum planning before baby arrives can save you a lot of stress when you will want to be resting and recovering from delivery. And, you might have postpartum brain fog that makes thinking about your options (not to mention making decisions) hard. At Doulas of Baltimore, we think of the first three months at home as the fourth trimester. The postpartum period comes with its own challenges and joys. Here are some basic questions to consider before you go into labor that will make your postpartum life easier. 

What will your home look like?

Because nesting is very real, you may have already set up a nursery or room for your baby. But realistically, this isn’t where baby will be spending most of their time. For the first six months, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends baby sleep in your room. But where does baby sleep during daytime naps? Do you want to have a dedicated changing table, setups in different parts of the house, or a moveable station? Where will be the best place to feed baby during the day and at night? Consider the layout of your living space and the setup of cribs, feeding or pumping stations, and changing tables. 

What does everyday at home look like? 

A baby changes things: we know this. And postpartum planning involves thinking about the details of how things have changed. Who will feed baby when they wake up at night? Who will change baby? Who will cook meals? Who will walk the dog? Who will take big sister to school? Who will go to baby’s appointments? Who will clean and tidy the house? 

Who can you go to for extra support? 

While everyone might want to meet your new baby, that doesn’t necessarily mean they can provide the support you need. Consider which friends and family can provide practical support, like buying groceries, cooking meals, walking the dog, or taking care of siblings if you are at the hospital longer than expected. 

Who are the care providers you need?  

With care providers, there are the basic people you need to have planned out, and others that you may want to think about having lined up. While you’ve been dealing with an OB, midwife, and/or doula before birth, afterward you’ll need a pediatrician. You may also want a postpartum doula or lactation consultant. If you are concerned about postpartum depression or emotions after birth, you may want to find a mental health provider before delivery since they can have Before you leave the hospital, you’ll need a carseat installed, and we recommend having it checked by a Child Passenger Safety Technician (CPST) or “car seat tech”.

What does post-parental leave look like? 

There is unfortunately no standard for parental leave, so consider when parents will be going back to work and what happens then. Do you have a nanny, babysitter, friend, or grandparent who can care for baby? Will you need a daycare? 

 

This is just a short overview of questions that we see new parents considering as they bring their babies home. Over the next months, we will be going more in depth on these questions and providing guidance and advice for the postpartum period.

Tips for Traveling While Pregnant or With Baby This Holiday Season

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Are you planning on traveling this holiday season? For many of us, this feels like the first, best opportunity to see loved ones after almost two years of the coronavirus pandemic and lockdowns. Here are some tips for flying or taking car rides while pregnant and with your newborn. 

No matter where you are traveling, consider getting vaccinated for COVID-19 if you are not already. USA Today recently reported that only 18% of pregnant people in the United States are vaccinated against COVID-19. The Centers for Disease Control, American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG), and World Health Organization all recommend the COVID vaccine even during pregnancy. The benefits of the vaccine far outweigh the risks. 

Flying During Pregnancy

The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) write that during healthy pregnancies, “occasional air travel is almost always safe.” Most domestic airlines allow pregnant people to fly until about 36 weeks of pregnancy, but international airlines may have different cut-offs. You should always consult with your healthcare provider and the airline before booking any travel. 

If you do choose to fly while pregnant this holiday season, you can do a number of things to make the flight more comfortable. First, book and aisle seat if possible. This way, you can get up and walk around more easily. Sitting for more than four hours increases your risk of deep vein thrombosis (DVT), a blood clot that forms in your leg and can cause pulmonary embolism (when the blood clot gets stuck in your lung). Even when you are sitting, you can move your feet, toes, and legs to keep up circulation. 

You should also wear the seatbelt low across your hips, below the belly and avoid carbonated drinks. All domestic flights currently require masks during travel, and you should consider wearing an N95 or surgical mask, which offer the most protection against airborne pathogens like coronavirus. To stay hydrated, drink water. 

Taking Long Car Rides During Pregnancy 

Like flying, taking long car rides during pregnancy might feel uncomfortable. Wear loose-fitting clothing and layers that can be taken off or put on. You should also be drinking water and eating regular meals. Usually when we drive we want to get there as soon as possible, but remember to stop to use the bathroom and stretch your legs. Sitting in the car for extended amounts of time increases the risk of DVT and can just be uncomfortable. 

Even though a few hours-long car ride might not seem as noteworthy as flying somewhere, remember to speak to your care providers about where and how you are traveling. They may want to offer additional advice to keep you and baby safe. 

Flying with Newborn Baby

You should speak with your baby’s care provider before deciding to go on a flight. As uncomfortable as flying can be for us, it can be especially bad for newborns. Because their immune systems are still developing and planes are by nature crowded spaces, babies might be more susceptible to picking up a virus during a flight. 

The cabin pressure changes may also hurt baby’s ears. If you are traveling, let baby suck on something during takeoff and landing. And while we don’t always notice how loud a plane is, the engines and air circulation can be very loud for a baby’s new ears. Consider noise-cancelling headphones to protect their hearing. 

The level of oxygen inside an aircraft is also lower, and while this might be fine for some babies, talk to your doctor about any of baby’s heart or lung issues. 

And, although baby is allowed to be in your lap during the flight, best practice would be to purchase a seat for baby and to properly install their infant car seat (double checking for FAA approval). This gives you the mobility to get up and move around as well as a familiar place for baby to sleep. It also is by far, the safest way for baby to fly. 

Finally, make sure that you have everything your baby might need during the flight in an easily-accessible carry-on bag. 

Car Rides With a Newborn 

First, make sure that your car seat is properly installed [link to blog]. Like flying, you should also have everything baby needs in an easily-accessible bag. You or your partner may want to sit in the back seat with baby.

Before you leave, consider when and where you’ll be making stops along the way. Think about when your baby usually eats and where the best place to stop might be. Because of COVID, you may want to stop at a rest stop or picnic area rather than a restaurant. 

How to Install a Baby Car Seat Safely

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Installing a car seat safely is one of the most important things to do before baby arrives. In fact, you can’t leave the hospital without a car seat. Choosing and installing a car seat that best fits your vehicle and lifestyle can seem daunting; that’s why our own Child Passenger Safety Technician (CPST) is here to help. Here are six steps to ensure your baby’s car seat is safely installed. 

Be Prepared

If you are a first-time parent, you’ve probably never installed a car seat before. And even if you have other children, you may not be familiar with your new car seat’s installation procedures. To install your car seat safely, read both the entirety of your car seat manual and the portions of your vehicle owner’s manual that pertains to child restraints. We recommend that you install your seat by your 36th week of pregnancy.

Accessories Can Be Dangerous

It might be tempting to use aftermarket accessories for your car seat or car. Don’t. Use only manufactured approved items that come in the box with your car seat (infant inserts, strap covers, etc.). This includes cozy winter inserts like the J.J. Cole Bundle Me, which are not approved for use in car seats. 

Don’t Leave Baby in the Car Seat

Avoid keeping baby in the car seat more than absolutely necessary. A car seat is designed to keep baby snug and safe, but limits baby’s movement. Even if baby fell asleep in the car seat or you want to keep baby in the car seat at a restaurant or indoors, consider babywearing or a stroller with a bassinet instead. 

Ensure Proper Use of the Car Seat

Straps should come through the slot just below baby’s shoulders, be snug enough that you can not pinch any slack at the collarbone or hips and chest clip should be even with baby’s armpits. Never loosen car seat straps or unbuckle the chest clip or crotch buckle unless you are removing the baby from the seat.

Consult a Child Passenger Safety Technician to Install the Car Seat Safely

Before baby arrives, schedule an appointment with a certified Child Passenger Safety Technician (CPST). A CPST is qualified and trained to make sure that your car seat is installed correctly and can help you install a baby car seat safely.

As a Doulas of Baltimore client, you may schedule your Car Seat Concierge appointment for $100. What’s included in our car seat concierge service:

  • Initial consultation to discuss your feature and brand preferences, budget, and lifestyle factors
  • Assistance in selecting the best car seat for your child 90-minute personalized car seat installation appointment with up to 2 seat(s) in up to 2 vehicle(s) 
  • 12 months of industry professional phone/email support as your child grows to ensure your confident in your child’s car seat safety

 

Contact us to learn more.